Manhattan, NY., May 4 - Since "The Great American Boycott" (or "Boycoot" if you're Canadian) began on May Day, supporters of amnesty for illegal aliens have been working hard at not working. "We need a break. Waving flags and screaming for 4 days straight is tough work. We are looking forward to Cinco de Mayo as a day of not working AND a day of partying. I think we deserve it." said one demonstrator.

The initial "Boycott" was chosen for May 1st to coincide with May Day. When organizers were asked why they chose a Communist/Socialist holiday as their day of protest, they replied: "We heard it was a holiday that celebrated work and workers. So we decided to not work. We had no idea that America didn't celebrate it, or that the Nazis made it an official holiday in Germany, or that the People's Republic of China hold it as a national holiday. Our bad, we're new here. We had no idea that America has it's own day called 'Labor Day,' that celebrates American workers... Again, our bad."
 
Tomorrow is the 5th of May, and many illegal aliens will once again take it to the streets. "We've spent 4 whole days talking about America. Although we wave Mexico's flag, and translated the Star Bangled Banner into Spanish, and are here illegally, I think we've earned enough respect from the stupid gringos, err I mean Americans, to celebrate Cinco de Mayo in style." If there's one thing Americans and Mexicans can agree on, it's celebrating a good 'ol French ass-kicking... and isn't that what Cinco de Mayo is really about?   

Message from the author: To prove I'm not a total  jerk, here's a little knowledge about Cinco de Mayo: Many, many people in the US believe that May 5th is a Mexican holiday celebrating their independence. This mistake is so common, I decided to clear the air. Cinco de Mayo celebrates the defeat of a French invasion to Mexico City. Vastly outnumbered and out gunned, the small militia of Mexico City held the city with cunning resolve and knowledge of their terrain. The French later returned with 30,000 troops and took Mexico anyway.The Mexicans rose up later and overthrew the French leadership and gained independence, but that's a story for another day.