A falsely trite response
Normally, I wouldn't blog about something I wrote on someone else's blog, but I thought this post from my friend Larry, coupled with my response, was too funny to leave unrepeated.
Larry's post concerns something I feel very passionately about: The L train.
I hate it. I hate it with such a passion, that I wish it's destruction. It is slow, annoying to get to, smelly, and full of dumb-ass hipsters who think they are cool because they live in the West Village. When did it become cool to live there anyway? I'm confused. Apparently, Larry feels as strongly about it as I do. He ended up in Williamsburg because that damn train arbitrarily decided to skip two stops during rush hour. (No there isn't an express for those wondering.) Immediately after I read his humorous post, I was reminded of a story. It is about me, the L train, and my grandmother. Enjoy.
Larry, I hear your pain.
For instance: My retarded, quadraplegic grandmother flew in from Ukraine last year and had never seen the city. So I took her in to show her the west side first.
"I want to see the east side" She squawked through her voice-box.
"But Grandma, the only way over there is on the L train."
"I don't care. I want to see what everyone is baggling about." (I assume baggling was a typographical error of her translator)
Off we went towards the L train. After an hour of carrying her and her gigantic wheelchair down 3 flights of stairs and 2 more hours of getting lost because the signage for the L is primarily retarded. I finally made it to the tracks for the L train.
What happened next, lives in infamy. As the L train came in, my grandmother decided she had a death wish. So she thrust her limp body on to the track of the approaching train, as I screamed out in shock and agony.
"Grandma! NOT like this! Not by the L Train!"
It was too late. The L train came in at full speed and when it hit my grandmother, it came to an abrupt stop. I jumped down into the tracks and carried my grandma back up in to her wheelchair, unscathed.
"Thanks." she said. "I always wanted to see the east side. Let's go up and wheel there."
True story.
The moral? Don't take the L train. It doesn't even move fast enough to kill my retarded, quadraplegic grandmother.
GREAT SIGHT
The next period in Pakistan’s history begins with the defeat of Raj Jaipal and his son Anandpal, rulers of northern areas of Pakistan, and of the Ismaili and Carmathian rulers of southern areas i.e., Multan and Sind at the hands of Mahmud Ghaznavi, leading to the unity of the two region. Eleventh century ushered in an era 70-236 study guide of Muslim rule over the entire length and breadth of Pakistan. During the 32 years of his rule Mahmud invaded Pakistan and India more than 17 times and though he carried his successful arms up to Muthra, Kanauj, Baran and Gawaliar, he did not annex any area 70-284 latest dumps beyond Ravi. As such, Pakistan continued to remain separate from India, again looking westward constituting a part of the Ghaznavi Empire. The boundaries also were almost the same which had been coming down from the days of the Indus Valley Civilization. It will be notice that this 70-620 dumps phenomena of Pakistan forming a separate country with its eastern boundaries running upto either Ravi, Beas or Sutlej has been recurring again and again.