how can you not love these animals...although they do bear a striking resemblance to tori spelling....

It smacks of sarcasm. It's ripe with wit. It is my bible. My holy gospel. My code. It's exactly the kind of Sunday-read any good man needs. I'm nominating it for a pulitzer. Hell, I'm tempted to call up Penguin Books and have it reincarnated into an "instant classic," alongside Oliver Twist and Pride & Prejudice. Yes, the tome I am referring to is none other than the Word of the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

Is this a sheep? A ram? A goat? An emu? I have no idea what this is. All that I do know is it's what is currently sitting on my mom's dining room table at home. 

Emma Heimple was born March 31st, 2006. She is the second child of our sister Samantha (A.K.A. Sam or Mandy, depending on who you ask.) She was a little premature, and a bit smaller than her sister, but just as healthy and beautiful. Welcome to the Planet Earth Emma! Sorry for the mess.

I need everyone to help me out.  I'm involved in a class that can severely improve my career as a copywriter. A couple of the higher ups within my company are running a session once a week that focuses primarily on analyzing and creating "good" ads. For those who don't know, I'm in the pharmaceutical advertising world. For the purposes of this class we will only think about consumer materials.

thought id post this to lighten the mood and get a little closer to this website's intention...

Tis finally time for it to stop snowing, the booze to start flowing, and skin to start showing. Ahh yes, spring is upon us and it couldn't come at a different time (mainly because time is a fixed measurement and cannot be altered without warping space fabric, but I digress).

There has been a current debate between my roomate,Christie, and I regarding Mr. David Johnson and his looks. Christie seems to think that Dave bares a stricking resemblance to Joaquin Phoenix, minus the cleft pallet of course.

Will they open another one? Who knows. All I do know is THAT one is closed... Here's a little history on why I love the bar, and some of my favorite memories. Most of you have heard me tell the story of my first day living in the city. When my friends and I returned from Shea Stadium, we looked for a place to grab a drink (or two, or a hundred.) We saw a little Irish bar with a yellow awning that simply said: "Kelly's." When we entered, we were met by a Brazilian girl named Karini. She took care of us all, and I introduced myself as a new neighbor. A friendship was born. Over the next few weeks I found myself out and about the city. With no friends, and no where to go, I usually wound up stopping by Kelly's. On a nice hot summer day, I met my best friend Brian. True story: He and I were the only two people in the bar. Neither of us are prone to talking to random dudes, but we couldn't resist making fun of a punk who walked by with his collar "popped." Brian turned to me and said: "Dude, I think people who wear their collars up should be shot." I agreed, and another friendship was born. There are many, many friends I have met solely because of our affiliation with Kelly's bar.